Monthly Archives: October 2011

Enforce the fragile peace…

I was listening to Michele Bachmann speak today (story covered here on and for the first time, I started to identify with what she was saying. For the first time, she was actually making a little sense. She was explaining why she feels the U.S. should maintain an indefinite presence in Iraq to “enforce the fragile peace” (whatever that means).

I can see her point. After all, we did go over there and overturn their government (although the original plan was to look for WMD’s which were never found so HEY, why not destroy their government without asking them first). Should we really leave them to fend for themselves before they’re strong enough to fight off the forces of Iran? She had me… she really did. But then she kept talking.

She started accusing President Obama (and it is “President Obama”, not “Mr. Obama”. I don’t understand why HE is the President known as “Mister” instead of “President” but I digress) of having political motives which may or may not be true. This is the time to start his campaign for re-election and getting the troops out of the Middle East has got to be worth some major points. We all know the repubs were going to play that card so we really can’t be mad at them for that.

She then goes on to say how we lost 4,400 of our soldiers’ lives along with $700 billion in U.S. tax dollars over the last eight years. She said, and I quote, “I believe that Iraq should reimburse the United States fully for the amount of money that we have spent to liberate these people. They’re not a poor country. They’re a wealthy country”.

I think to myself, “Okay… oil rich nation… they can afford it… okay, maybe I can get onboard with that IF they had asked us to intervene but they didn’t so… what the hell are you talking about?!? If I go into your house uninvited and wash your dishes and do your laundry then demand payment, isn’t that a form of extortion?”

Then she says this (and this is where my ears begin to bleed) “I think that they need to do that, because what we will be leaving behind is a nation that is very fragile and will be subject to dominance by Iran and their influence in the region. That’s not good.”

Let me break that down potato head style. She basically said THEY need to pay the U.S. back because WE’RE leaving THEM defenseless…WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!? I don’t understand what one has to do with the other. Are you insinuating that they should pay us protection money? What the hell is wrong with you!?!

OH… then she goes into a rant about how Iraq doesn’t want us there in the first place. How the U.S. spent $800 billion in resources (her words) and they are booting out by the very people who liberated them (who, didn’t ask for help in the first place).

Which one is it lady? Are you angry because the U.S. troops leaving or angry because the Iraqis don’t want them there? You can’t appear on national TV and go off into a rant on how you’re upset that President Obama is bringing the troops home AND how Iraq has expressed to us that they don’t want us there in the first place.

If the president was bringing the troops home against Iraq’s wishes then fine, be angry. If the president was keeping us there against Iraq’s wishes then FINE, be upset! BUT, if he’s taking us out of Iraq AND Iraq doesn’t want us there… THEN WHAT THE HELL IS THE FRACKIN PROBLEM?!?

We can’t Americanize them. We can’t Americanize anyone. I don’t understand why the repubs and their tea bagger cronies continuously believe that we need to make an American clone out of every fracking country we “help”.

In my sad little opinion, it’s very simple Michele; if they don’t want us there then we NEED to get the hell out, point blank! Christmas is about to get really happy for tens of thousands of U.S. citizens with family off fighting the war. We need to focus on how to make THAT happen!

P.S. good luck getting THOSE votes, nice job there sister.


Banks are making us pay for their mistakes.

Ok, I understand that business is business. People go into business for one thing and one thing only, to make money and banks are no different. If this were not the case then people would just give their products and services away for free and we’d be beaming each other up to ships in outer space and do away with cooking altogether (sorry, should have warned you about the Star Trek references).

All this aside I was reading this article in The Seattle Times about how banks are rapidly moving towards charging a monthly fee for the “privilege” of using a debit card. They’re justifying this by pointing out that they’re having trouble making money the old fashioned way, by lending money to customers and business. The interest rates are at an all time low and they can’t make any money that way anymore. Um… what happened to all those sub-prime loans you gave to people who couldn’t afford it some years ago… Oh that’s right… THEY COULDN’T AFFORD TO PAY IT BACK!

So let me get this straight, if I’m running a successful business with many loyal customers and I decide to take a very high risk that fails and I loose money, I can then turn around and increase my prices to make my loyal customers pay for my mistake? Hmm… WTF is wrong with this picture? Am I missing something? Can someone explain to me how in the hell this can possibly be ethical?

If I give my money to someone who I know will not pay me back, isn’t that my loss? Isn’t that on me because I knew going in I might not get my money back? Banks squander millions of dollars giving sub-prime loans to people that, through their own research (credit checks, etc…) know they can’t afford it and when (surprise) they can’t pay it back, somehow I have to fucking pay for it?!?!

In my sad little opinion, this is complete and utter bullshit. I think its time to open the bank of Serta and start stuffing the mattress.


Our Predator and Reaper drones are sick?

11:34 am, July 11, 2000. It was a sunny afternoon, the birds were chirping and the… blah blah blah. This was the day I first had access to the internet. On that magical day, I discovered the joys of eBay, AOL and other… questionable media. I ran ramped around the interweb without a care in the world. I was going to conquer this vast new virtual land and call it my own.

4:07 pm, September 1, 2000 this virtual land that struck me as a new and adventurous place had revealed a side to itself I thought I was immune to. My precious new machine was struck with a virus. My vast 20gb hard drive was wiped clean and my heart was broken. Fast forward 11 years and 4 computers and the lessons I’ve learned have been burned into my soul.

While trolling for interesting news that will piss me off enough to write about, I found this little gem. As it turns out, a computer virus has hit our U.S. Predator and Reaper drone fleet… maybe you didn’t feel me on that one. I think it merits repeating. Super sophisticated military equipment built specifically to rain hell on enemy territory from above with absolutely zero U.S. casualties has seemed to have caught a bit of a cold.

Picture courtesy of

Can someone please tell me how the most technologically advanced military in the world can allow a virus to infiltrate the most expensive remote control airplanes ever produced? Apparently, this virus records every keystroke made by the pilots as the drones fly over Afghanistan and other war-zones… um… WTF!?! That’s not all, every time they attempt to remove the virus from the system, it manages to come back. HOLY HELL, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE!?!?

What can this information be used for… hmm… let me see. Maybe they can use the information to monitor where the hell they are going and um… I don’t know EVACUATE or worse USE THEM AS TARGET PRACTICE? How effective is a covert mission if WE TELL THEM WHERE WERE GOING?

Oh and that’s not all, as it turns out (according to this story I read on CNN) many of these drones don’t encrypt the video that’s being transmitted back to the military bases allowing the enemy to intercept the info and download it to their own systems using a $30 app acquired from the internet. NOT ENCRYPTED! How many people do you know with wireless internet and no security code (that was rhetorical)? Most people’s systems are better protected than these million dollar big boy toys. Look, I don’t mean to trivialize our great military or the expensive advanced technology they employ but come the fuck on! Haven’t they heard of McAfee?

In my sad little opinion, if I were in charge of the programmers and engineers developing these systems, I’d line them all up and smack every single one of them three’s stooges style!

Steve Jobs… May you rest in peace.

When I was young, I had a friend who had parents who had a clue about technology and bought him an Apple IIe. That machine blew my mind and this year (sooo many years after then) I bought my first Mac (a sweet little MacBook Pro that I love thank you very much).

Short and sweet, Steve Jobs… May you rest in peace.

@pattonoswalt: RIP Steve Jobs. Closest thing we had to Tony Stark.”

Some people just won’t go away (no matter how hard THEY try).

Ever since the story broke about that mother (who will remain nameless) who “allegedly” killed her daughter, I just knew she would walk. That’s not something that I’m proud of or anything, I just wanted to put that out there. A month or so had passed since the kid was missing but she never reported it? C’mon, that’s a long time to plan a cover up. Most murderers only have a few hours, if not minutes to come up with a viable story to fool the authorities. This sub-human had thirty something days.

When the jury came back from deliberation and the verdicts started coming in one by one as “not guilty” I felt both angry (as I suspect many, many… many, many, many other people were) and, if I may be honest, not in the least bit surprised. Of the mountain of evidence bought against her, none of it could be made to stick and in the end, all she got in trouble for was forging some checks and lying to police.

With that very brief and probably only slightly accurate synopsis out of the way, let me get to the meat and potatoes of why I’m even wasting time with this. It’s been almost two months since you fuckos let her go (meaning a jury of HER peers) why are we still talking about her?

Look, I understand the news of the not guilty verdict is still sore but really… really? She went to trial and after what seemed to be an endless stream of fuck up after fuck up, the investigators couldn’t make it work and the prosecution couldn’t convince anyone BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT that she killed anyone.

Do I think she did it? YES. Does it matter what I think, NO. It doesn’t matter what ANY of us think. The bitch is out and about and probably going to make millions on a movie and/or a book deal (no justice on any level). WE CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT IT! She can come out and say, “I killed her you assholes and you let me go… BITCHES!” on national news and still, WE CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT IT!

So why in the hell are we still talking about her and giving her coverage and releasing evidence previously suppressed? Because we’re a nation of knuckle brains hell bent on torture that’s why. Just let the mother of year (sarcasm ladies and gents) go and live in Argentina or Europe or where ever she wants and lets focus on the little girl she “allegedly” murdered. I realize this is going to be difficult, but the more time we dedicate to queen bitch the more famous or infamous she gets and the potential money she’ll earn from her story skyrockets. Let’s face it, no matter how much she is hated by the general public, the millions she’s going to make from her book/movie deal is going to come straight from their pockets (I say “their” because I WILL NOT purchase anything that has anything to do with her but… that’s just me and I’m just one person).

In my sad little opinion… we need to get over it. Caylee’s law is one step closer to becoming a reality and it’s important for the future of our civilization that these things are spelled out (as sad as that may sound… whatever happened to common sense?).

For those who don’t know, Caylee’s law is going to require people to report a missing child as soon as it they go missing (again, what happened to common sense?).